december

I don’t know if I was ever any good at bringing you comfort

I might be the very last one on the list

But if you make it that far down…

The fight is exhausting

Feel my fingertips on the keyboard

Staying mad is a chore

Sitting on the hardwood floor of uneven boards 

Patchwork from a 100 years of wear and tear

Cold air threatening at my window

Shared melodies

A backdrop of old memories

It’s Christmas 

I do everything for me now

Catch myself wondering what you’d think of this and that

Hard habit to break

Small ways of holding on

Catch myself thinking what if

Catch myself

I catch myself

Missing the feeling of leaving with the only two things that matter

Never looking back on dreary New England

Misty April morning

The invisible season 

I miss the desert

Where everything has been sucked dry

And still thriving 

It’s like I was on a merry go round and didn’t know it

Was everyone else watching

Waiting for the dizzying whirlwind to catch up to me

It caught up to me

Not until I lost my balance

Took a good look around and saw I was right back where I started from

I don’t know if this brings you any comfort 

To know I’m still gathering my footing

I usually catch a glimpse on the highway

And I’m filled with envy and wonder

Where are they going

Do they know how far it will take them

Do they know if they are coming back

Do they have a plan

Do they think this one thing will make things better too

It’s a lot of weight on rotating wheels

Do people you loved ever really leave you

Are you lying if you say so

I don’t think they are supposed to

I don’t think that’s the way

There was adventure and we were naive

Lovesick

Maybe just love

Maybe just sick

Maybe there’s more I was meant to learn 

And I was too deep in it

What is it about tragedy that makes you want to reach 

back into the past and hold onto the ones who left

Perhaps it’s shared misery

Pain is familiar 

It might be the only thing that ties us to one another

More so than love

Stronger than love

Was I ever any good at bringing you comfort

Was I ever any good at loving you

Was I ever any good at doing what wives are supposed to do

Remind me

What are they for

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *